Tonight I miss having you...
if I ever really did have you.

Anything we gain by deceit isn't really ours at all, so I guess I had you, but perhaps you did not have me.
Silly it sounds because you had it all, I gave it all, only in your mind you knew what was left unsaid and only you really knew what wall you kept between us.

The Cave

It's empty in the valley of your heart
The sun, it rises slowly as you walk
Away from all the fears
And all the faults you've left behind

The harvest left no food for you to eat
You cannibal, you meat-eater, you see
But I have seen the same
I know the shame in your defeat

But I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again

Cause I have other things to fill my time
You take what is yours and I'll take mine
Now let me at the truth
Which will refresh my broken mind

So tie me to a post and block my ears
I can see widows and orphans through my tears
I know my call despite my faults
And despite my growing fears

But I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again

So come out of your cave walking on your hands
And see the world hanging upside down
You can understand dependence
When you know the maker's hand

So make your siren's call
And sing all you want
I will not hear what you have to say

Cause I need freedom now
And I need to know how
To live my life as it's meant to be

And I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again...

I'm too tired for this, but I'm hope I'm right about it.

Not only do I miss you.
Not only do I miss your gorgeous little ones.
I miss the man I was, the man I had become.
He seems to be all but entirely absent today..

Uh oh...
This one's gonna be tough.

What a freaking disgusting dream.
The worst part about it, is it's something that's very possible.
Bleh... another one I'd like to forget.

From green to blue.
From blue to grey.
Brown.

Why doesn't brown ever turn so pretty?